Echo Bay United Church

echobay united.com

P.O. Box 447 Echo Bay, On P0S 1C0 (705) 248-2801

United Church of Canada | London Conference

April 2008

Hello students. It's about time to be in contact again! Hope your year went well and all the best in exams.

AS LONG AS THERE ARE TESTS THERE WILL BE PRAYER IN SCHOOLS.

We spend approximately 30 percent of our lives sleeping – or trying to sleep. Today there are more than 300 sleep disorder clinics in the United States . There are also 90 million Americans who snore, and they (or people who share a room with them) spend about $200 million a year on anti-snoring remedies. Think of it. Nearly a third of our entire lives sleeping! One man follows a HWLW routine before retiring for the night.

It stands for “His Word the Last Word.” Every night, just before turning out the light, he reads a passage from the Bible or meditates on a verse he has memorized. Before he goes to sleep, he wants the last word he thinks about to be from God – not the evening news or the weather, not the late-night talk show host or the celebrity guest, but a final word from the Lord. Why don't we all try it? Spiritual preparation for a peaceful night's sleep!

I DON'T SKINNY DIP, I CHUNKY DUNK!

A Sunday School teacher asked her class to draw pictures of their favourite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's picture, which showed four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent. “The Flight to Egypt ,” was his reply.

Pointing at each figure, Mrs. Graneldehide said, “That must be Mary, Joseph and Baby Jesus. But who's the fourth person?” “Oh, that's Pontius – the pilot!”

MAY YOU ALWAYS HAVE:

LOVE TO SHARE,

HEALTH TO SPARE,

AND FRIENDS THAT CARE.

During a picnic on a scorching day at a Wisconsin lake, Ole's fiancée Bess said how much she would enjoy some ice cream. So the young Norwegian immigrant gladly made a 5 mile round-trip by rowboat to bring it to her. When he returned exhausted with a container of melted ice cream, Ole told himself there must be a better way. He put his mechanical mind to work, and a year later in 1907, Ole Evinrude field-tested his lightweight, detachable motor for small boats. He married Bess, and when the outboard motors went into commercial production, she wrote the advertising slogan: “Don't Row! Throw the Oars Away!” Ole Evinrude was not a lazy man, but he understood the limits of human power. Each day we employ machinery to accomplish the tasks of life. But we often stubbornly rely on ourselves when we're trying to serve God. In Ephesians 3:20, the apostle Paul urged believers to find strength in “Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that works in us.”

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

A patient checked in to a Florida hospital for a life-saving amputation. He awoke to find that the wrong foot had been removed. In the same hospital, another patient had surgery on the wrong knee. Defenders of the healthcare system point out that such tragic cases of malpractice are like airline crashes – they are newsworthy because they are so rare. In that Florida hospital, officials responded with a plan to avoid what could go wrong: Staffers now write “NO” with a black Magic Marker on the healthy limb!

AN INVISIBLE MAN MARRIES AN INVISIBLE WOMAN. THE KIDS WERE NOTHING TO LOOK AT EITHER.

Gone are the days when a real person greets you on the other end of a phone call. It seems as though whenever we try to “reach out and touch someone,” we are greeted with a computerized voice. Aren't you glad this isn't true of our Father in heaven. He is always there. No voice-mail boxes, no “press 2 for more grace” and no “call waiting” interruptions. Thankfully, “Call to Me, and I will answer you” (Jer.33:3) has not been replaced by, “All lines are now busy. Your call is important to Me. Please stay on the line.” Yet it's interesting to wonder what kind of access He has to us? Communication with God is a two-way street. Is He getting through to you?

THERE IS NO LEGACY AS RICH AS INTEGRITY.

The only survivor of a shipwreck was washed up on a small, uninhabited island. He prayed feverishly for God to rescue him, and every day he scanned the horizon for help, but none seemed forthcoming. Exhausted, he eventually managed to build a little hut out of driftwood to protect him form the elements, and to store his few possessions. But then one day, after scavenging for food, he arrived home to find his little hut in flames, the smoke rolling up to the sky. The worst had happened; everything was lost. He was stunned with grief and anger. “God, how could you do this to me!” he cried. Early the next day, however, he was awakened by the sound of a ship that was approaching the island. It had come to rescue him. “How did you know I was here?” asked the weary man of his rescuers. “We saw your smoke signal,” they replied. Author Unknown

IF LAWYERS ARE DISBARRED AND CLERGYMEN DEFROCKED, DOESN'T IT FOLLOW THAT ELECTRICIANS CAN BE DELIGHTED, MUSICIANS DENOTED, COWBOYS DERANGED, MODELS DEPOSED, TREE SURGEONS DEBARKED, AND DRY CLEANERS DEPRESSED?

Most of the men at the rescue mission service were unkempt. Some were only half awake. Not one face indicated eager anticipation as I began to speak. I thought to myself, What can you expect? These men are skid-row alcoholics. But then the attitude of Jesus came to my mind, and I said, “Men, people sometimes refer to you as hopeless derelicts, but they are wrong. God sees each of you as a worthwhile person with awesome potential. He is eager to forgive you, accept you, change you, and give you eternal life.” In Christ, the hopeless find hope.

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Have a wonderful summer. And God Bless!

Love and prayers,

Bar River and Echo Bay United Churches

 

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